Pages 21-23 are in Dropbox-Kav
Ok, let's have a look.
Hey, it's the Corner Bar! I love it. This page is very moody. Great angles. I like how dopey Kinetic looks here. He really looks as useless as he is feeling. I hate to even put wordballoons over that middle row of panels.
In panel 3, his glasses look a little uneven. Do you see that?
the glasses are in perspective.
Page 22. Nice work. I am sorry I gave you so many panels to cram into this page, but you rolled with it very well. Good job.
In panel 5, Kinetic is powered up, but powered down in Panel 6, and back up again in panel 7. This makes panel 7 look odd. Also, his pose is a little TOO exaggerated. He is just startled, not in full fight-or-flight. Other than that, this page is terrific.
want me to power him up in panel 6?
Actually, I think the better fix is to power him down in panel 7. Or, have it fading out. On in 5, fading in 6, and gone in 7. When the doctor turns around, he should see a weirdo in a mask, not a powered-up super-person. -Josh
I'll power him down dude
Page 23. In reviewing the script for this page, I was happy to see that the dialogue is pretty light on this page. Again, I was afraid of covering up too much of the art.
I love how dark this page is. It really looks like night time. Panels 3 and 6 are especially nice for this.
And, oh yeah, I meant to bring that doctor back at some point but I never did. -Josh
maybe he can sew kinetic up at some point.
That was the plan, I just never got around to it. Little foreshadowing here, Kinetic does end u in the hospital at the end of the next story arc. Maybe Dr. Jogger could show up there. -Josh
Plots are best when they interweave like this